A euphemism for "I'm ordering a pizza."

This weekend was filled with things that sounded like euphemisms for dirty things, but were not. People actually meant all the things they were saying.

On Friday night, Chris and I went to the Chocolate Maven for dinner. It's the best bakery in Santa Fe. The dinner was ok, but any kind of dessert you get there is amazing, and their bread is fantastic. Their dining room is tiny, and one whole wall is made of floor-to-ceiling windows that look into their giant bakery. I liked watching the giant mixers, like this one. But towards the end of the night, when were trying to decide if we should order dessert, or just get cupcakes or something to take home, this guy came over to the table and started unwrapping block after block of butter. Then our waitress came over and said something we did not expect.

Waitress: Are you guys going to stay and watch him pound the butter?

Us: Um... what?

Apparently at the end of the night, the bakers unwrap about sixty pounds of butter and smash it with this thing that looks kinda like a cross between a rolling pin and a baseball bat. I'm not sure what this accomplishes, but it sounded awesome. Sadly, we were the last people there, and there really wasn't any reason for us to stick around anymore, so we did not get to see him pound the butter.

Then the next night, on Saturday, two of my friends, Tamara and Scott, had their birthday party. They're a boyfriend and girlfriend, and their birthdays are one day (and five years) apart. Isn't that cute? So we all got together. They made lasagna, and garlic bread, and chili. And then for dessert, because apparently Scott's not a big cake guy, we had pie. There was apple and chocolate silk. And Scott made cinnamon ice cream to go with it, but he had tried out the ice cream maker before, and it came out to a pretty custardy texture. So after we finished dinner, Scott stood up and said, "Well, gotta go make the custard."

And every time he said it, someone pointed out how dirty it sounded. All night long.

I hope you enjoyed your weekend, too.

Why does the question football get a Lorelai?

Well, the Super Bowl has come and gone, and I must say, I'm not sad to see it leave. There was madness, everywhere. Sundance Square was all blocked off, and ESPN was there shooting live. It was camp for the Steelers fans. At the convention center in Dallas there was The NFL Experience. Apparently it was really cool. I didn't go. The Lombardi trophy was there. There were autograph sessions with famous football stars. The Packers camp was out in Dallas somewhere.

When it came to the game itself, it was less than thrilling. I know that you're shocked, but I actually watched. I went to a friends house and he was having a watching get together, and it was more fun being with a group of people. It was more for the ambiance than the game.

Let's start with Lea Michele singing America the Beautiful.



She's amazing. That's all I have to say.

Then, Christina came and sang the National Anthem. No bueno.



Couldn't Lea Michele have sang both? Christina, not only was really bad, but messed up the words. Come on. It's the National Anthem. She said in an interview that she was excited cause she'd been performing the National Anthem since she was seven. If she's been performing it for so long, wouldn't you think she could get the words right?

Then came the halftime show.



I think the quality of the show was horrible. I've been told that seeing it live was much better. A lot of sports announcers who were at the game have talked about how live, it sounded great, and was quite the fun experience. But on the recording, the mic volumes are all jacked up, at times their voices are over powering, and at other times, you can barely here them. It was a really random appearance by Slash, and Usher. Having both of them there and actually do something would have been cool, but they were there for a minute, and then gone, without really doing anything. Visually it was kind of interesting, with all the dancers, and whatnot. But that was about it.

And apparently Will.i.am changed some lyrics . . . "It wasn't quite a wardrobe malfunction, but Will.i.am had an off-script Super Bowl moment of his own during the Black Eyed Peas' performance on Sunday night. The singer delivered a message to President Obama by changing three lines to his band's hit "Where Is The Love?" during the 15-minute medley:

In America we need to get things straight / Obama, let's get these kids educated / Create jobs so the country stays stimulated.

As far as political protest subjects go, children's education and creating jobs aren't the most radical of topics, but I appreciate Will.i.am using America's biggest stage for a constructive purpose. Normally, stars treat their Super Bowl halftime appearance as an opportunity to promote themselves, their albums or partial nudity, so it's nice to hear a little non-controversial social awareness. I think we're all in favor of smart kids and people having jobs."

Personally, I think they should have had the Glee kids come do something, like they did during halftime of the championship game on the show following the Super Bowl.



Muchos amounts better. :)

Then there were the commercials. Here are some of my favorites, in no particular order.

Jack in the Box - I Love America



NFL - Best Fans Ever



Best Buy - Really, I'm just amused by the fact that the Osbournes are in a commercial with Justin Beiber. What kind of world do we live in?



Snickers - Logging



Chevy Camaro - Bumblebee



Careerbuilder



Telaflora



And of course, probably my favorite, the Volkswagen Darth Vader commercial. I can see my nephews doing this.



And apparently, the Super Bowl was the place to be for the rich and famous. Everyone was there. Usher, Maroon 5, Sarah Shahi, Steve Howey, Lauren Froderman, George W and Laura Bush, Consoleezza Rice, Michael Douglas, Catherine Zeta Jones, A-Rod, Cameron Diaz, Leah Michele, Chord Overstreet, Matt Bomer, Hayden Panettiere, Josh Duhame, Chase Crawford, Jessica Szhor, P-Diddy, and the list goes on. Arlington Texas is on the map.

Oh yeah, and somewhere in all of that, foot game was played. A team from one of those northern states where it's cold won.

What the hell are the Eskimos thinking? I mean, yes, the hoods are cute, but it's always cold. Always!

Today was a snow/ice day. Mostly ice. The high was 18 today. With 20-30 mph winds, it felt below zero. Everything's closed. The Mall, Costco, everything. There are truckers stuck on 30 in Dallas, and some of them (apparently about 20 truckers all together) have been stuck all day, causing major blockage. It's the coldest it's been in 15 years. I like the cold, I just wish there had been more snow along with all of this. It's not as much fun playing on ice.

And the superbowl is coming. The Steelers and the Packers got their own personal sand trucks to drive in front of them where ever they were going. How not far is that? It's supposed to be in the 50's on Sunday for the big game. That's crazy Texas weather for you.

Right now I'm just happy to be inside with Gilmore Girls and hot chocolate. What more could a person want?

I do believe that denying you were a Trekkie is a violation of the prime directive.

Chris has put on a Star Trek movie, because there's nothing else on. He says it's the best one, but all I hear when William Shatner talks is cheese.

I'm going to go hide in the other room now.

And now the CBS Evening News with Dan Rather

Ok, so it's not the CBS Evening News, but it is time for

....drum roll please...

A guest blogger, namely, my dear older sister, Julie of Coco and Cocoa.


So, my sisters and I and our friend Kat have an overwhelming obsession with Gilmore Girls. My sister Lauren and Kat started a blog devoted to their love of Gilmore Girls called The Devils Starchy Fingers.

And today I get to contribute to their blog! So here it is...

In case you didn’t know, I am Lorelai Gilmore. Yep, me.

So at the mall at work the other day (yeah, I worked at the mall over Christmas. It sucked.) I was going to the bathroom on my break and there was this woman in there with her two kids. A daughter, and well, not a daughter. Which would have been fine if the not daughter was 2, 3, 4, or 5. Because at those ages they hopefully wont remember when they are older. (Like when they are 40). But this not daughter was easily 10 or more. The mother wasn’t very tall (I’m not very tall and she was shorter than me). The not daughter (aka son) came up to my shoulders and a little taller on her. Why o’ why o’ why???

Now, I admit, I have had some bad experiences sending my twin boys to the men’s restroom. There was the time one of them had an accident in the stall at the mall and wouldn’t come out. And I stood in the hall crying because I couldn’t figure out how to get him. Finally some nice woman walked into the bathroom and yelled at all the men to zip it up because a Mom was coming in to get her son. And then I did. And then there’s the fact that the boys seem to take FOREVER in the bathrooms sometimes, and I stand there listening to them playing in the sinks and singing. But I figure all of that is better than the trauma of them coming into the women’s restroom with me. But apparently that would be considered modesty, which according to Lorelai, “went punk”.

From the Gilmore Girls transcript

Outside of the Restrooms at the Harvard Yale Game during season 4

PENNILYN: Of course there's a line. Why wouldn't there be?

LORELAI: You know, you kind of want to hang out here anyhow.

PENNILYN: Why is that?

LORELAI: Some woman just took her forty-year-old son in there.

PENNILYN: No.

LORELAI: He might not be forty, but the images he's gathering up in there will last until he gets there.

PENNILYN: Why do women do that?

LORELAI: I don't know.

PENNILYN: When I was growing up, there was such a thing as modesty. I suppose that's not in fashion now.

LORELAI: Nope, modesty went punk.

And for exhibit 2 that I am Lorelai Gilmore.

The twins, the baby, my sisters, and I all went shopping after Christmas with some of our Christmas cash. By the time we left store number 1 one sister and the twins each had a bag of stuff. After store number 2 both sisters had bags and one of the twins had 2 bags. And me? Nada, nothing, zilch. Just like Lorelai.

From the Gilmore Girls transcript
Rory and Lorelai exit a clothing shop and begin walking down the street.
RORY: If I still want that sweater in twenty minutes I'm coming back to get it.
LORELAI: Okay, wait. What is wrong with this picture?
RORY: Huh?
LORELAI: You - look at you. An armful of bags and a potential twenty-minute sweater on the way, and look at me. Completely bagless.
RORY: Relax, the day's still young.
LORELAI: There are no more clothes out there for me. The Lorelai look is over. I wish someone had told me.
RORY: That would've helped.

Every song is the same. The same two notes. How does that happen?

So, it's three days before Christmas, and I am sick of the Christmas commercials. I realize the best solution would be to stop watching television and go read a book or something. Especially since everything on right now is either junk or reruns of stuff I've already seen. But what else am I supposed to do while I knit? Plus, we lent all our Harry Potter DVDs to Ko, because he admitted he had only seen the first one, and I couldn't accept that. So I can't even put those on again.

I'm just tired of seeing the same four commercials over and over. Perfume, jewelry, cars, Target. Rinse and repeat. Blargh.

And just for fun, every now and then, they throw in an obnoxious snuggie commercial. The ones with the people singing stupid versions of songs with the word snuggie crowbarred in there. I especially can't stand that one girl that has the solo line. She's trying so hard, and I imagine she's some kid who's been trying to get ahead in musical theater her whole life, and she probably feels like this is a big break for her. Sorry, musical theater girl, but I can't stand you or your commercial.

Am I always this cynical, or do you think the holidays are bringing it out in me? It doesn't help knowing that you will already be off tomorrow, while I am at work, doing all the stuff I didn't get around to today. Boo.

I had the german measles in the 5th grade, I still had to show up to the Christmas party.

Christmas is coming, the goose is getting fat!

Well, there's no goose, but Kara's home! That's close enough, right? I kid, I kid.

I am quite excited that Kara's home for Christmas, but for some reason, at least to me, it doesn't seem like Christmas yet. Maybe it's because I have a job, and only get the 23rd and 24th off. Part of me is still used to being a student and having weeks on end off for the holidays. Sometimes I wish I had that back. Hopefully today we will get our Christmas decorations out of storage, and that might help me get into the Christmas spirit.

Perhaps I should also watch some classic Christmas movies, such as Miracle on 34th Street, It's A Wonderful Life, and A Muppet Christmas Carol. (Yes, A Muppet Christmas Carol is a classic!)

Recently I got to have dinner a catch up with a friend of mine some high school, and that was a lot of fun. It's fun to be in on some of the post high school gossip. Nice to know my life isn't as cracked out as some peoples.

Jamie turned 1! He's so cute! Check it:



He really enjoyed the blue frosting. He looked like a smurf by the end of it.

Sometimes, having nephews makes everything better. :)